Inspiration

Did you see it?

The DNC last night was simply incredible. From Al Gore (did you watch his speach? Seriously, go to YouTube, it was fantastic) to Martin Luther King III to our man, Barak Obama, I was purely inspired. These people make me proud to be an American, proud to work hard and live life for those I love. Proud to be a democrat, and certain that Senator Obama needs to be our next president.

The stadium was overflowing. Outside the stadium was overflowing. Times Square in New York looked like New Year's Eve, but with Red, White and Blue. Viewing parties were set up all over the country, including my very own home.

It is time for this country to move in a progressive direction. We need the type of change spelled out last night, and we need it now. We needed it four years ago, we needed it eight years ago. Will this be the year that we get it?

I received a call yesterday asking me to volunteer this weekend for the Obama campaign. I'm conflicted. I have strong opinions, but don't necessarily want to force them on anyone. Going door to door isn't exactly my bag. However, if we get all the progressive-minded people to realize that they ARE progressive and their vote DOES matter, we could make the difference. This inspirational night makes me reconsider returning that phone call. It is time for a change, in the country and in me.

They read part of a proverb last night. "When you pray, move your feet". I love that. It isn't the praying that brings the results, it is the moving. The action. We all need to move our feet.

I Heart Hillary Clinton (but not as much as I heart Obama)

DNC, baby, Yeah!

Have you been watching the shindig? Does it make you all weepy in the eyes and weak in the knees? No? Just me then?

Hillary Clinton kicked ass last night. She was so REAL. and HONEST. and HEARTFELT. I could taste her disappointment at not being the nominee, but could also feel her earnest love for this country and her party. She's accepted she will not be the president inaugurated on January 20, 2009 and will do everything in her power to make sure that Barak Obama IS that president.

I like Hillary Clinton. I was a conflicted primary voter. In the end, I voted for who I believed to be the candidate needed at this time in this place. Not because of his or her gender or his or her race or even because of his or her experience. Because of their ideas, the people they'd place in their cabinet, the voters they could inspire. I simply cannot fathom the voters who went from die-hard Hillary to McCain. The hell? If anybody's policies are on different political spectrums, those two are. In Hillary's words, are you in it for HILLARY or are you in it for your children? Your future?

I am very much looking forward to Bill's speach tonight, and have an excited anticipation of The Man Himself (Mr. Barak Obama) on Thursday night. I love the joy and pure excitement that I feel this year, this election. I love that I'm not the only one.

I am NOT looking forward to Friday, when the spotlight turns on the RNC and McCain's VP. Because after all the weepy eyes and weak knees this week brings? I'm preparing for then nausea and exploding head that next week will usher in. Maybe I'll just keep the TV and computer shut off. Yeah, that would be best.

Starting Again (again)

Today, I actually woke up and got my walk in before I went to work. Of course, I left for said walk an hour and a half later than I'd planned, but still. Awake and walking before the baby woke up. Go me.
I love taking walks with Sofia. I love running with Sofia in the stroller. However, it is rather hard to maintain correct form while pushing a stroller or with a baby on your back. So, by waking up in the morning, I can run by myself, walk using my exercise poles, actually swing my arms and not worry if Sofia dropped her pacifier, or if she's too cold, or if she's getting sunburned. I'm proud that I actually did it, and plan on doing it every morning.
I'm starting again. For real. Again. I am going to do this. I am going to get in shape.
My friend Melissa (a crazy runner--I mean, she did a 10 K the day before her daughter was born) is going to help me train for a 5-10K run. I mean, not a huge goal, but a goal nonetheless, and if someone is giving me assignments, or meeting me someplace, I can't bail. No excuses.
So, I'm fighting the urge to get a chocolate bar and the need for a mid-afternoon sugar rush. I'm choosing to go get some water, and to sit my butt on that exercise ball I keep at work. Maybe I'll do some crunches while I'm there.
There will be progress. Yes, I can.

Oh, HAI! What did you do this weekend?

Clean a little? Play outside?

Go swimming? Visit a friend? Relative?

Poison a pet?

Me too. No, wait, you DIDN'T do that last one? Yeah, me neither. Or I mean, yeah. I did. I did all those things. Not necessarily in that order.

Before I go on, let me tell you, HE IS OKAY. Deep breath. Breathe in the peace, out the guilt.


My dog gets allergies. We've tried a lot of remedies to help him. Apparently he is allergic to August.

We switched his food. We bathe him weekly and put oatmeal, aloe, skin soothing lotion on him (ever lotion a DOG? Yeah, it is hairy and gross), we give him Fish Oil. We give him Benadryl. He's been on prednisone. We've seen a vet. Twice.
Mostly, we are able to control the allergies until the frost, when they go away.

Saturday, we ran out of Benadryl. We were busy. No time for the store, no time to call the vet. He was red. Itchy. His droopy, dark eyes begged for relief.
So. Without thinking (does much thinking happen in this head? Not much lately), we gave him other allergy medicine. The kind with a 'claritin' and a 'D' in it.
Know that ingredients are in there? Let me tell you.
A) an antihistimine. Good for those itchy eyes and red skin.
B) psuedonephrine. Good for killing dogs.

So, yeah. We gave our dog "medicine" that could kill him. How's that for "first, do no harm", huh?

He started acting funny. He couldn't sit still. He couldn't even eat a treat in one sitting. He paced. He circled. We began to suspect foul play.

So, I did what all grown-ups do in this type of situation. I called my mommy. Who told my dad. Who informed me that I, in fact, gave my beloved dog what could be a lethal dose of a doggie poison. Becca, in the living room, with the Claritin.

So, think I should be allowed to continue to mother this young human in my care?

The Party

Only slightly delayed, but well worth the wait, I present to you, "Sofia's First Birthday Party", starring little miss Sofia, the world's sweetest and newest one-year-old!

Photobucket Album

Finding Motivation

So, how does one find motivation?

I'm falling off my work-out wagon again. My get-skinny-before-getting-pregnant-again agenda. I always have an excuse, and most of them are valid! I'm tired. It is dark. The mosquitoes are bad. Sofia woke up three times last night. I have to work late. My sports bras are all dirty. I'll do it later. I'll be better tomorrow. And all of a sudden tomorrow becomes next week and you realize you haven't been on a walk/run in over 7 days. That you are slacking.

So, I need to find my motivation. That part inside of myself that wants this, for me. That wants that extra flubber off my middle and wants to put on a swimming suit and not dash for the cover-up. The me that glances in the mirror and sees what she remembers.

I need to make the time for me. I feel guilty whenever I take a minute to do something that isn't for the house, or for my daughter, or for my husband, or for my dog, or for my extended family, or for a friend, or for my work. Something that benefits ME. When I go for a walk, I always take my daughter. Why? Because she likes it. Because I need time with her. Because I like it. But it is also not just for me that way. When I search for motivation, I think first of how I want my husband to see me (though he always tells me I'm beautiful, and I know he always means it) how I looked when we met. Because that way this journey is also for him, not just for me.

Why is it so hard for me to recognize that I need this? That it is mine, that my health and my self-confidence are what is at stake?

I think moms could do with being more selfish sometimes. In the end, a happy well-rounded mother benefits everyone.

Happy first birthday, my love

Sofia is One Year Old.


Dear Sofia,

Happy Birthday, my girl! Today we celebrate you, your first year with us, and the many years to come. It wasn't too long ago that we met, this twinkle in my eye and flicker in my womb



We watched you grow



and grow



and our anticipation grew along with you.



We named you on the day we found out you were our daughter.



Then, on the most incredible day of my life, August 16th, you slipped out of my womb (or more like wrestled) and will remain permanently in my heart.





We were filled with our fears about being parents, and our wondrous joy at meeting our own personal miracle.



You were so impossibly tiny, so incredibly perfect.



The most beautiful newborn I'd ever seen.






Walking into the house with you for the first time was so surreal. I couldn't believe it. Here you were! Finally, our beautiful daughter in her very own home. Our new family of three. I've never felt so blessed.



Those first days home with you were so much fun. We had lots of visitors, and we all sat around admiring you, being with you, cuddling you, and enjoying each other. You were the star! A sleeping star, but we all loved you so very much.





You grew so quickly, changing every day. We loved to kiss every inch of you!






By two weeks old, you were positively chubby!




In the blink of an eye, you were smiling, and nearly 1 month old!







That fall, you and I went for so many walks together. I loved being out with you, showing you the places I loved and just being together. Always, I talked to you, forever, I loved you. Your personality began to shine through and I'd get glimpses of the person you were becoming. No longer a newborn, but my baby.




At two months, your smile was plentiful, and you started to laugh! I've never heard a more beautiful sound than your precious giggle.





Every stage brought new joys, new discoveries, and lots of love. Each month that passed made me more grateful that I was chosen to be your mother.




You dressed as a pumpkin for Halloween,



and started sitting in your Bumbo, happy with your new view of the world.








Soon, it was winter.


We would bundle up and sit in front of the fire as a family.



You loved your first Christmas tree, and made an adorable elf!



Christmas brought family and fun! You started to show an interest in toys, and began wanting something in your mouth at all times.







We started our own family tradition in Kings' Day. You had a good time eating your new toys and sitting in your high chair for the first time!




And still you kept growing. You could sit by yourself, and loved to read stories and snuggle with Mama and Papa.





We got to visit your family in Venezuela, and you had a great time! You laughed with everyone, and were able to swim in the ocean! The sand was your favorite part.





You really started to eat foods other than breastmilk, and we discovered that you absolutely adore berries!




The winter was long, and I ached to get back outside, for spring and flowers. It was so fun to introduce you to grass and playgrounds!






Spring slipped into summer, and you began to really explore your world. You started to crawl, to stand up on things, to express your opinions. And girl! You have a lot of opinions!



You had your first boat ride, and your first dip in a lake.




I turned around, you were eleven months old, started to take some steps, cutting your first teeth, and rapidly becoming a toddler.






You have given us the most incredible year. I still can hardly believe that you are my daughter, that I've been blessed so much. I love waking up to you in the morning, I love giving you a bath at night. I love your kisses, your wave, your babbles and your very first words. I love how you read stories, and how you kiss babies and kids. I love your laugh. Most of all, I love you, my big one year old girl. I am so excited for your second year and all the years beyond.